tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-84340990765671845002024-03-12T20:30:58.208-05:00mothering in my 20'severything you never wanted to know about raising a family. including, but not limited to, explosive poop, flying puke, the things you swore you'd never do. oh and a great deal of oversharingerinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10204137969548359860noreply@blogger.comBlogger42125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8434099076567184500.post-73740698743109025012010-08-04T09:48:00.005-05:002010-08-11T17:19:15.127-05:00"mama"best word ever. (even when she's crawling after me all over the house whining it)<br />current vocab: mama, da, and dog<br />plus attempts at kiss ("ssss") and up ("pu")<br />currently working on mastering her skills at crawling with toys in her mouth. gosh i have talented children.<br />speaking of talent: riley was balancing a tub of margarine on his head the other day.<br />"look at me! i can balance butter on my head! can you sign me up for the circus? when i turn four".<br />well of course! because it would be silly to sign you up when you're three. four is the minimum age requirement. especially for something as risky as butter-balancing.<br />the end. i need coffee.erinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10204137969548359860noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8434099076567184500.post-87126926589249908342010-07-30T21:10:00.004-05:002010-08-11T17:21:13.492-05:009 months!gosh. it feels like her 1st birthday is just around the corner *tear*<br />macie has been busy!<br />-her first tooth popped through on wednesday. i was surprised because i haven't felt anything underneath her gums. she is quite protective about it. if you so much as move for her mouth, she slaps her hand away.<br />-she has a sloppy little wave that she started doing to. i have it on video, she still won't do it for matt, though.<br />-all of a sudden she started clapping. she does it when someone says yay. and especially when she turns on her ball popper toy thingy. it's hilarious.<br />-she is trying sooo hard to talk. she chases the dog around the house yelling "daw! daw!". and when she's following matt it's "da! da!". she babbles and squeals<br />-she also gives kisses (aka opens her mouth wide and lunges at your face). i left her with my grandma for a few hours the other day when i had a doctors appointment. when i came back she gave me "kisses" for about 5 minutes straight. love!<br />-she is so much more mobile, too. she's standing all the time, for a few seconds on her own. she's walking her way around furniture. she loves to push her activity table around. oh, and stairs. she can climb stairs. great.<br />-we packed the hated swing away. the exersaucer has apparently become a cage.<br />-macie lovesssss food. anything and everything. sweet potatoes, avocados, squash, peas, green beans, apples, peaches, mango, plums, bananas. we've started more finger foods (beyond the puffs and mum mums). graham crackers are her fav. she would devour an entire box. she also likes pasta, little bits of chicken, cheese, sweet potato pancakes and cheerios. she hates yogurt, though. cries and spits it out. egg yolk isn't a big hit either.<br />-she drinks four 5-ounce bottles most days still. usually 7,11,3 and 7. she's missed the 7pm bottle a few times.<br />-she's been quite the daddy's girl when matt gets home.<br />-she absolutely ADORES riley. he makes her laugh harder than anyone. she follows him around allll day. sometimes he gets a little frustrated, but is really good with her. he watches to make sure she doesn't get anything she shouldn't have. he tells other people what she can't have or can't do.<br />-she is so much more interested in her toys lately. she's been figuring out how to move and shake them. how to turn them on. she gets so excited when she figures something out.<br />-naps are getting better. she sleeps between 45 min to 2ish hours at a time. usually she goes down at 9 and 3. sometimes 12 in between. most times she takes her nuk and goes to sleep. if she doesn't want to sleep, her favorite game is throwing as many nuks out of her crib as i put in. then she screams. and screams. part of the bad napping is thanks to riley. he is SO loud. not on purpose, but he has no "inside voice". it's either sleeping or yelling. i find myself constantly reminding him to be quiet because macie is sleeping. he tries hard, but then forgets and yells.<br />she also went to her first brewers game. she did really well. innings i think. napped, too.<br />-macie is in 6-12 month clothes.<br />-macie loves: brewer, riley, mommy and daddy, the camera, remotes, cell phones, food, standing<br />-macie dislikes: sleeping, yogurt, being "ignored", laying down<br /><br />and what has riley been up to?<br />-he took a museum class about the solar system and can tell you about constellations.<br />-the other day he learned how to open his "child-proof" vitamins. he said he needed vitamins. i told him to bring me the bottle. he brought me an open bottle. nice.<br />-the things he say amaze me everyday. i don't remember what we were looking at, but he told me "i'm going to go get my other one to compare" hm..ok?<br />-he's been loving the museum, the zoo and swimming.<br />-he would stay outside all day and play baseball, soccer and basketball.<br />-he's finally starting to play by himself more. i love to see him "acting" out scenes with his space sets or fire station.<br /><br />someday i'll get some pictures up. because my kids are pretty frickin' cute.erinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10204137969548359860noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8434099076567184500.post-71037060024050376342010-07-22T20:14:00.005-05:002010-08-11T17:21:41.147-05:00me? never.if you had told me two years ago that i would cloth diaper my next child? well. i would have laughed at you. and thought you were gross.<br /><br />with riley it was disposables all the way. i knew nothing different. i didn't know anyone who had gone with cloth. my idea of cloth was poop-stained pieces of cloth and plastic pants. yuck yuck and more yuck. but, really, the thought never crossed my mind with riley. actually, there are a lot of things that i didn't do with riley because i didn't know any different (another post, for another day)<br /><br />macie was in disposables for the first few months. i think it was around 5 months that we (i) bought her first cloth diapers. matt was hesitant at first. but, when it comes down to it, he puts them on just like he would a disposable. if she poops, it usually can be plopped right into the toilet. we also have flushable liners that help. the messes? i deal with those. and they're really no big deal. i do the laundry. usually every other day. cold rinse. hot wash. cold rinse. usually we dry them outside.<br /><br />when we first started out we did a mixture of disposables and cloth. as my stash got bigger, the disposables were fewer and farther between.<br /><br />there is a lot that i love about cloth diapering:<br /><br /><ul><br /><li>less waste</li><br /><li>one less thing on the grocery list</li><br /><li>soooo much softer on macie's little bum</li><br /><li>no chemicals, antibiotics, etc on that same little bum</li><br /><li>oh so many options! pockets, aoi's, side snap, aplix...</li><br /><li>they could not be any cuter. seriously.</li></ul><br /><p>cons?</p><br /><ul><br /><li>um. it might just be a bit of an addiction</li><br /><li>the initial cost (although i did get some good deals. read: bumgenius 3.0s: 1 free and 2 for $2.50 after purchasing other essentials like spray, doublers and liners)</li><br /><li>having to "defend" my decision against all the "ew" and "disgusting" comments</li></ul><br /><p>so, for my personal future reference (and anyone else's):</p><br /><p>here are the diapers we've tried so far:</p><br /><p>bumgenius: i really love how trim they are. we have the velcro. a little questionable. it seems to be wearing a little already. plus it never stays on the laundry tabs in the washing machine. we've only had one leak. and that was my fault, leaving her in it too long. macie has some chubby legs, and these never leave marks. my one complaint? they smell. yep. they come out of the wash smelling fresh. but as soon as she pees in them? gross. and not a pee smell. i can't really describe it. i've heard this from some other moms as well. plus they take forever to dry, but that's to be expected, being an aio.</p><p>fuzzibunz: had some leak problems at first with these until i adjusted the leg elastic. another good fit. pretty trim as well. these are also super soft. they're also not too tight around the waist.</p><p>gdiapers: i don't dislike these quite as much as i used to. i'm not a big fan of how these are made. they're a little thin and lined with plastic. the plastic, combined with the fact that you just lay the insert on top of the plastic, makes it difficult to get a good fit. not sure how comfortable they are, either. these were the first cd's i bought. i liked the fact that you could use a cloth insert or flushable one. these would probably work well under jeans, though.</p><p>flip: have yet to have a leak with these. they're one size. they're also nice and trim. my only complaint with these, like the gdiapers, is that the insert isn't very secure just set inside. we also haven't had a lot of luck reusing the cover. poop or pee always seems to get on it and it needs to go in the wash.</p><p>kawaii: i bought a few of these on recommendation from someone. they are suuuuppppeeerrr cheap (um 6.99ish). because of the price i was hesitant (are they going to send me a garbage bad to wrap around macie's bottom half?). so far, i am pleasantly surprised. we have one of the pockets, a nighttime diaper, and a minky one. no leaks with any. i am especially happy with the nighttime diaper. it's bulky, but definitely does the job. the fit on all of them seems to be good. a few complaints, though. none of the diapers are very trim. i also wasn't very happy with customer service. i had ordered a cow print and was sent a heart print. i was offered a $5 refund, but still. i don't think i will be ordering anymore. partly because of that, partly because of the bulkiness and mostly because of the $12.95 for shipping.</p><p>applecheeks: i love the feel of these. i also like the elastic in the front. i think they're mobile-baby friendly. i got the size 2 because macie would haev been at the tail-end of the size 1. it's a little saggy in the butt, but i'm excited for her to grow into it. </p><p>happy heinys: super cute. we have the cow print. love it so far. i like the way the velcro goes all the way across the front. i've heard they're a good brand for chunky thighs, which macie proudly rocks. </p><p>i'm in the market for some trim diapers next. i'm a little concerned about jeans and fall clothes once it's no longer summer/diaper and tshirt weather.</p><p></p><p></p>erinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10204137969548359860noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8434099076567184500.post-49867079194556625522010-07-15T09:35:00.002-05:002010-07-15T09:46:27.957-05:00ughhhhwhat happened to my good napper? she has been replaced with a nap-hating, screaming, hyperventilating creature.<br />old naps: 9 am-change diaper, lay macie down, give her her nuk, she takes it, rolls over, maybe whines a little, falls asleep.<br />new naps: 9 am-change diaper (so far, so good), begin to lay macie down, as soon as she feels me begin to tilt her horizontally, all hell breaks loose. lay her down, give her her nuk. she promptly spits it out, glares at me and starts shrieking. it's not a sad cry. it's a "woe is me. how dare you do this to me. i'm not having this shit. get me out of here now. i said now" kind of cry. i leave. and peek through the crack in the blinds on the door. she trashes. stands up. stands at the crib railing, stares at the door and just screams. and screams. and screams some more. eventually she lays back down (or collapses out of sheer exhaustion), locates her nuk through eyes clouded with anger and tears, and goes to sleep.<br />old naps were way easier. and much more quiet.<br />i have held my ground, though. giving in to her only makes it worse. if she cries long enough i will go in. as soon as the door handle turns, she stops, looks, and smiles. tricky baby she is. i comfort her. and turn for the door. the screaming wayyyy worse. so i try to avoid that situation.<br />hopefully this too shall pass.erinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10204137969548359860noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8434099076567184500.post-2726173702975026082010-07-06T11:20:00.002-05:002010-07-06T11:34:59.629-05:004th of july weekendfirst, i need to start by saying that my not-yet-4-year-old can ride his bike without training wheels as of last week! how cool is that?!? yay riley! i gave him one push and he was off. no looking back. he crashed into a few bushes, but sometimes i still do. he can even start himself now. not even a week later, he is riding like a maniac. sharp turns, quick stops. it's enough to make me look away. the apparent catalyst was his new helmet (with flames) that he was so proud of. as he rode up and down the alley, he looked at me and said "is this a dream?" haha!<br /><br />moving on: we had a nice holiday weekend. matt is off all week which is AWESOME (no sarcasm), especially since i have been less than stellar lately. friday we went up to his parents' lakehouse (while they were in london without us). we went out on the boat and had planned to spend the night, but the mosquitos were SO bad. they were all over the house. as the day went on, the only got worse. we made a mad dash for the car, but still ended up with 2 dozen or so inside the truck. oh and a broken windshield. courtesy of matt. and his attempt to smack a mosquito. he's either that strong, or the windshield sucked. either way it needs to be fixed asap, since we are currently trying to sell it. (anyone want a 4runner?)<br />saturday we went to my grandparents for my grandpa's 77th birthday party. fun was had by all. saturday night i got a migraine. woot woot. sunday was the 4th. we went swimming at my aunt and uncle's. then we spent some time at our friend's (with their 5 kids 5 and under!!) and lit off some fireworks. brewer was less than thrilled. needless to say, the kids were exhausted. i'm surprised they lasted as long as they did. monday morning we went to the world's longest parade (seriously..2 hours?!?). oh and it was like 95 degrees. i didn't think i would survive. barely did. the heat and i? not friends. back sweat? not pretty. we thought about going to fireworks, but they started too late and the kids would have been batshitcrazy. so we opted out.<br />did i mention we're in the process of teaching macie the meaning of the word "no"? an interesting process it is. especially since her favorite pasttimes involve death-traps like lamp cords and dog food. and since she pulls herself up on anything and everything.<br /><br />i have a ton more to write about (including my novel to matt's mother) and lots of pictures. now all i need to do is find time...erinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10204137969548359860noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8434099076567184500.post-47655473386624029912010-06-28T20:19:00.002-05:002010-06-28T20:25:51.907-05:00bedtimein our house, bedtime goes something like this:<br />bath. way easier to bathe both at once. except riley can't "swim" as well.<br />bottle (for macie. except tonight she only wanted an ounce. which turned out to be because matt had just fed her before i got home from work. oops. awesome communication).<br />books (2 for riley, 1 for macie while rocking).<br />bed. macie usually grabs her nuk, rolls over and closes her eyes.<br />riley? not so much. we go up. put on a diaper. feed squish the fish. say prayers. cover up.<br />then the questions start.<br />"mom? mom? just testing"<br />"i need to say goodnight to dad again"<br />"can we go see the stable where jesus was born? is it knocked down? can you check?"<br />"tomorrow can we find tigers fighting on the computer?"<br />"did i have a long day today"<br />and on.<br />and on.<br />and on it goes.<br />no amount of ignoring (he just yells louder), or deferring until tomorrow (he just keeps talking through my pleas) or answering (there are ALWAYS more questions) work.<br />he eventually tires. at least he has so far. and i do have to give him credit..he is far more creative than the standard "i have to go to the bathroom" "i need a drink"erinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10204137969548359860noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8434099076567184500.post-48803870327692298042010-06-21T09:28:00.002-05:002010-06-21T09:44:17.940-05:00playing catch-upa lot has been going on in this house:<br /><br />first...macie is crawling! the beginning of the end. she first did it on june 17th (and i was too lazy to write about it). at first she would only crawl for food (puffs a few feet away). now she'll do it for a toy or to get to someone. in just a few days she has really started to get the hang of it. and is quite pleased with herself. oh and we found her standing up in her crib a few mornings ago when she woke up.<br /><br />we got a puppy. (what? you crazy people. what is wrong with you?). well, to avoid sounding defensive, i will simply say that i love dogs. we want our kids to grow up with dogs. it isn't the "perfect" time. but it never will be. he's 8 weeks old and 8 lbs. riley and macie are entralled.<br /><br />riley has been enjoying his summer so far. we've been doing some swimming. lots of baseball. he has a new friend that just moved in across the alley. it has been a godsend. they play practically every day. awesome.<br /><br />yesterday was father's day and i think matt had a nice day. it was a little busy. two get-togethers. but he had a nice day with the kids.<br /><br />we went to door county with my mom, my brother and the kids last weekend. riley had a blast swimming. the kid is like a fish. traveling with two kids, though? not so much fun. if macie wasn't sleeping in the car, she was screaming. riley was inquiring about the remaining distance as soon as we left our street. great. still a nice time.<br /><br />that's about all i have time for right now. need to shower and get the kids ready for the day..erinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10204137969548359860noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8434099076567184500.post-44186585307666684442010-06-08T22:03:00.002-05:002010-06-08T22:10:55.674-05:00sibling rivalryriley is going to be in for a rude awakening. pretty soon, too.<br />"mom. i took (insert cool, fun, shiny toy here) away from macie. but i gave her this (insert sharp, unfun, boring, rock-like thing here) instead."<br />fair enough. take something, trade something.<br />macie couldn't care less. she doesn't know what's going on.<br />all is fine and dandy.<br />until macie knows what's going on.<br />and doesn't want that rock that riley gave her so he could have the cool thing that has flashing lights and makes noise.<br />so right now riley's all "i can take something cool away from her. and give her some piece of crap. and i don't get in trouble. sweet"<br />just wait, little boy.<br />pretty soon you're going to have to get more creative.<br />or make some sacrifices.<br />and it's not going to be pretty.<br />riley can share. he's actually pretty good at it. usually. sometimes.<br />but little siblings can be a bitch.<br />they want everything you have. "you don't want that car? me neither. what, now you do? GIVE IT TO ME"<br />i can hear the screams of protest already. judging by riley's stellar ability to whine (man, can that kid whine) and macie's scream that would drown out a flock of 10000 seagulls, i think i'm in for it.erinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10204137969548359860noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8434099076567184500.post-2565127932807668782010-06-01T22:28:00.004-05:002010-06-08T22:13:45.828-05:007 monthsi'm sitting here feeding macie a bottle (because i woke her up to change her. oops) and thinking about our late night feedings that seem so long ago. at the time, i would have given just about anything for macie to sleep through the night. now i kind of miss them. i don't miss being so tired i just wanted to cry. but nighttime is one of the few times macie is cuddly. she doesn't stop from 7am until 7pm. but in the middle of the night she would just snuggle.<br />now she's 7 months old!<br />per the precedent i've set:<br />*6-12 month clothes (usually. but sometimes she wears 3-6. why can't all baby clothes follow the same sizing guidelines??? i'm talkin' to you, carters)<br />*size 3 diapers<br />*sleeping from 7 or 8 pm until 4:30 am (at which point daddy has to replace the nuk). then she's up at 6 or 7 to eat and back down until 8. too bad riley doesn't sleep until 8.<br />*i was planning on writing about my awesome napper who takes 3 or 4 naps a day (an hour or so for each). but she apparently disappeared, only to be replaced with that icky baby who screams in her crib for 45 min ("let me out. let me out. i'm so tired i can't keep my eyes open. but let me out") until i give up and come in ("there you are. it took you longer than it did this morning. what's up with that") and her sneer of accomplishment.<br />*macie is sooo close to crawling. she gets up on her hands and knees and rocks back and forth, just willing herself forward. then she falls. and screams. or she scoots herself backwards. and screams as she goes.<br />*still a champ at sitting. she got a compliment on her posture from an er nurse (more on that later) like we work on in at home. "no! why are you slouching! what are you, a 5 month old? back straight!"<br />*oh, um, she pulls herself up on things. yea, great. like riley's bed rail. or her toy basket. or people. just try and make her sit. or, godforbid, lay down. then you're really asking for it. when riley was a baby, i couldn't wait for him to hit all of his milestones. sit! crawl! walk! talk! now i know what i'm in for. would it be bad for me to start pushing her down? yea, i thought so. i just won't tell anyone about it.<br />*still trying to get her off of her soy formula. soy. you know. that stuff that was supposed to be better than god himself. and now apparently it has hormones and you shouldn't drink it. that's the stuff. well, macie has other ideas. everytime we try to switch, she's fine for like 3 days. and we're all "ooo. finally. look at this. she's fine". then she farts. and screams. and farts some more. back to the soy. with some breastmilk mixed in.<br />*da-da-da, ba-ba-ba, du-du-du. just a sampling of the babblings of macie. brilliant, i know. she's not a huge talker, though. when she wants to she does. like when she sees that goofy glo-worm. or when she's mad. she doesn't cry when she's mad that often anymore. just yells at you. when ry was a baby he used to talk and talk and talk. constantly (still does). just like he would laugh. all.the.time. you have to earn macie laughs. they're expensive, apparently. and reserved for family. just like her smiles. "mom. how dare that lady smile at me"<br />*pretty much loves all food now. squash, sweet potatoes, avocado, pears, apples, peas, green beans, oatmeal, rice cereal. oh and baby mum mum rice rusks. she can hold them herself. and they just dissolve. she shakes when i bring the box out. sooo exciting. don't you dare walk past her with a bottle, though, unless she can have it. you will not hear the end of it.<br />*growing more enamored with riley by the day. and vice versa. the other day, macie was being particularly unruley and i told riley we were going to have to take her back to the baby store. he was not happy. at all. he told me that, no, she lives here. i gave in and let her stay.<br />*i have given up on the swing. i figured if it hasn't grown on her yet, i'm probably out of luck. at least i have the memories of riley swinging happily in it to compare to the ones of macie screaming and panting in it. she does like the exersaucer and her jumper. as long as you watch her in them. or anything. she'll sit in her highchair. if you watch her sit. she'll sit on the couch. if you watch her sit. she'll even chew on things. if you watch her chew.<br />*she has this awesome (not) new arching thing. she does it when she doesn't want to sleep. or be held. or get dressed.<br />*macie is getting less cuddly by the day. if she doesn't want to be on your lap, you better hope you have a good grip, or are standing above something soft. constant motion.<br /><br />likes: being watched. at all times. her family (must.find.family. must.know.where.they.are.at.all.times). anything that isn't a toy. food.<br />dislikes: sleeping. being buckled in anything.erinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10204137969548359860noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8434099076567184500.post-24815033401338168852010-05-26T10:55:00.003-05:002010-06-08T22:29:03.933-05:00i have a baby who turns blueand no one can tell me why.<br />10ish days ago macie's hands and feet started to turn purple all the time. like a bright, obvious purple. weird, i thought. breathing normal. eating normal.<br />it kept happening. so to the pediatrician we went.<br />"that's weird. it shouldn't be happening"<br />duh.<br />she sent us to a pediatric rheumatologist.<br />cbc-normal (neutrophils a little low, per usual)<br />cpro-normal<br />ekg-normal<br />great, right?<br />well, yeah. except it's getting worse.<br />she has a rash. everywhere.<br />her hands and feet don't turn purple anymore.<br />they turn blue. like, really blue.<br />and so do her lips and around her mouth.<br />and they stay like that for half an hour or so.<br />and she's crabby. all.the.time.<br />she gets up at night. all.the.time. shrieking.<br />gah!erinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10204137969548359860noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8434099076567184500.post-47710116716862978502010-05-16T10:32:00.002-05:002010-05-16T10:45:51.394-05:00busy busywe've been pretty busy at our house lately.<br />for one, i graduated yesterday. yay me! (even though i plan on going right back). matt has been an amazing support and i'm so grateful for that.<br />riley has been busy with finishing up soccer and school. his soccer "practices" are hilarious. he's actually good, but it's just funny to watch such little kids running around and playing soccer.<br />sometimes i wonder what goes through that kid's head. we had this conversation the other day:<br />ry: do you think junkyard dogs live anywhere besides junkyards?<br />me: i'm not sure<br />ry: well, where else would they live?<br />me: i really don't know<br />ry: well that's the point!<br />what 3 year old tells you what the point is?<br />sometimes i'll say something to him, and he'll say "that reminds me!" and go on to tell me what it made him think of. it's like talking to an adult.<br />macie moo has probably been the busiest.<br />if she allows me to put her on her tummy, she'll scoot in a circle and backwards sometimes. you see the frustration when she wants something out of her reach and she just wants to go.<br />she has also decided she likes to stand. she'll stand on the chair, holding on the the armrest. she'll even stand at the little activity table i pulled out of the attic. not for long, of course.<br />she has also discovered a new favorite activity: blowing raspberries. along with this has come increased "talking". she loves to shout and she's started making consonant sounds like da-da-da and ba-ba-ba. oh and she does this AWESOME new gasping/shrieking noise. it's not scary or anything. she gets a big kick out of it "gotcha mom!"<br />oh and her hands and feet were purple for like 2 days. i called the pediatrician because they were, like, REALLY purple. so now we have to watch that. i was getting her dressed and thought she had gotten paint on them or something.<br />like i said, busy busy!erinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10204137969548359860noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8434099076567184500.post-6133466560154084112010-05-14T10:22:00.001-05:002010-06-08T22:11:45.046-05:00i let my kid watch tv and play with knivesnot at the same time, of course.<br /><br /><br /><br />ok so the second part is a lie.<br /><br />but not the first. *gasp*<br /><br />and i'm sure there are people out there who would rather have me condone the first.<br /><br />but there are days when i need to take a shower. or eat. or have 10 minutes of quiet so that i don't have to lock myself in the basement.<br /><br />so riley gets to watch tv.<br /><br />not all day.<br /><br />and he doesn't sit for more than 45 seconds. so he probably only watches in 45 second intervals anyway. (he gets his attention span from me).<br /><br />we don't eat junk food in our house.<br /><br />we don't have the tv on during family time or dinner.<br /><br />we play board games and read books. a lot.<br /><br />but sometimes tv is a necessary evil.<br /><br />because mommy needs to maintain some sanity.<br /><br />i know mommies that don't allow any tv.<br /><br />or don't have a tv. (we don't have cable).<br /><br />riley is a smart kid (yes, i like to toot my own horn. i like to think i have had some part in that).<br /><br />he is a smart kid who watches tv sometimes.<br /><br />sometimes, tho, i wonder why they advertise the ab circle pro on kids channels. when my kid shouts from the other room "hey mom. maybe you should get the ab circle pro" i am forced to reevaluate my life. and cry myself to sleep. during the day.erinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10204137969548359860noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8434099076567184500.post-59707085394975369002010-05-11T09:24:00.006-05:002010-06-08T22:14:18.534-05:00good days and bad days.i am definitely making progress.<br /><br />there was no specific day that i woke up and thought "golly...i feel like myself again"<br /><br />nothing like that.<br /><br />but if i think about myself 2 months ago, i think of a girl who had no idea what to do. who couldn't help but cry all day. who couldn't bring herself to get out of the house.<br /><br />these days i have good days and i have bad days.<br /><br />on my good days i can play candyland. i have patience. lunch is chicken and broccoli. we go to the park. i get the grocery shopping done. i make dinner. i think that i'm fine. i think that i don't need to see a therapist. i'm good!<br /><br />on my bad days i can hardly do anything. i don't want to get out of bed. i am so exhausted and have NO energy. shopping seems like an impossible task. my children drive me crazy. lunch is a hotdog. dinner is nonexistent. i worry about anything and everything. one little worry turns into two, and turns into many. i can't think straight. i realize that i still have things to work through.<br /><br />in the beginning all of my days were bad days. slowly i started to have some good days (with the help of meds, of course). the good days are becoming more common, but the bad ones still rear their ugly heads. "we're still here!"<br /><br />i wish i had control over it. some days matt will apologize. he'll say he's sorry that i'm not happy. that makes me feel worse. i have no control over it. there is nothing anyone is doing, or not doing, that is causing what i am going through. sometimes it hits me out of nowhere. i'll be fine. then i start to worry about something. then something else. it snowballs. i usually can't stop it. nothing anyone says really helps. i need to walk away and try to talk myself out of it. somedays i'm just sad. sad for no reason. everything could be going my way, and it wouldn't matter.<br /><br />but, like i said, it's getting better. and for that i'm grateful.erinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10204137969548359860noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8434099076567184500.post-950604520023703262010-05-10T22:24:00.003-05:002010-06-08T22:15:16.828-05:00weird-othe other day, my husband told me (as he often does) "you're frickin' weird". he said it with love, of course.<br />so i got to thinking about it. and i really can't argue about him.<br />i have several...i'll call them..quirks<br /><ul><li>i can't drink water at night. it makes me sick. for whatever reason, if i wake up at night and have some water, it seems to have a syrup-y consistency. then i want to vomit.</li><li>when i'm upset..don't touch me. i'm sure there are other people out there like this. my hubby thinks it's weird. i cry. i stomp. i want him to say nice things. but i don't want to be touched. and i complain and get upset about the nice things he says.</li><li>i cannot relax. not even if my life depended on it.</li><li>i check the stove and doors every night before i go to bed. three times.</li><li>i am creepily picky about hotels. i have, on several occasions, made matt leave hotels because i was creeped out by the room.</li><li>i also make him leave restaurants if i don't get a good vibe. even if we've already been seated. and ordered drinks. </li><li>i usually have to sleep with one leg out of the covers.</li><li>i frequently rearrange the furniture in our house. like a lot.</li><li>everything makes me nauseous. one time, i told matt he needed to stop talking, like now, because i was going to vomit if he didn't.</li><li>sometimes i will re-read an entire page in a book, newspaper, etc because i "feel" like i missed something.</li><li>i am terrified of centipedes. i once saw one scurry under our dryer and watched to make sure it didn't come out until matt came home. then i made him move the dryer and kill it.</li><li>i will fight about anything. anything. if i think i'm right (and well..i always am), i will fight you about it. </li><li>i remember everything. sometimes based off of where i was sitting, what i was eating, or what i was wearing. </li><li>sometimes i go to target 3 times in one day. oops. </li><li>taking a bite out of a hard boiled egg without slicing it completely grosses me out. </li></ul><p>weirded out yet? i'm sure there are more.</p>erinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10204137969548359860noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8434099076567184500.post-23167244171817243422010-05-07T09:24:00.006-05:002010-06-08T22:17:06.877-05:006 months old!<a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_6oNRSPj7Gik/S-cVO-X9zkI/AAAAAAAAAIc/luvPAxViLWw/s1600/P1060207.JPG"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 320px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 240px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5469363619470626370" border="0" alt="" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_6oNRSPj7Gik/S-cVO-X9zkI/AAAAAAAAAIc/luvPAxViLWw/s320/P1060207.JPG" /></a><br /><div><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_6oNRSPj7Gik/S-cVObpBG_I/AAAAAAAAAIU/4G2ZlZEHqRU/s1600/P1060200.JPG"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 320px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 240px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5469363610146905074" border="0" alt="" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_6oNRSPj7Gik/S-cVObpBG_I/AAAAAAAAAIU/4G2ZlZEHqRU/s320/P1060200.JPG" /></a><br /><br /><div><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_6oNRSPj7Gik/S-cVN520RJI/AAAAAAAAAIM/0JioCd674J0/s1600/P1060205.JPG"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 320px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 240px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5469363601077978258" border="0" alt="" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_6oNRSPj7Gik/S-cVN520RJI/AAAAAAAAAIM/0JioCd674J0/s320/P1060205.JPG" /></a><br /><br /><br /><div><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_6oNRSPj7Gik/S-cVNW-dhhI/AAAAAAAAAIE/lg0qO9USoMw/s1600/P1060199.JPG"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 320px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 240px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5469363591714801170" border="0" alt="" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_6oNRSPj7Gik/S-cVNW-dhhI/AAAAAAAAAIE/lg0qO9USoMw/s320/P1060199.JPG" /></a> oh.my.gosh.<br />i have a 6 month old baby.<br />i can't believe how fast it has gone, just like it did with riley.<br />sometimes it's hard to remember how little she was when we first brought her home. the way she would curl up on your chest and sleep. the way she loveeeeddd to be swaddled. her tiny little squeak cry.<br />now i have baby gigantor. macie actually turned 6 months old last friday, on the 30th. but we just had her 6 month doctor visit yesterday.<br />so:<br /><ul><li>macie is an awesome sitter. she sits straight up, unassisted for pretty much as long as we leave her be.</li><li>she still loves to talk. you can see that she's trying to imitate sounds and the way you move your mouth now.</li><li>she loves her exersaucer. she can spin the seat around to get to all of the toys.sophie the giraffe is another favorite. you know, biting its head and choking it. </li><li>the hatred of the swing continues.</li><li>she tolerates the bouncy seat (we now have 3 different ones.</li><li>she likes her playmat, but she'd much rather be upright.</li><li>tummy time is still the bane of her existence. the pediatrician said she might not have much of an interest in crawling. when she does roll to her tummy, she pushes up and tries to "swim" with her legs. she looses interest within 3.5 seconds and either rolls back or screams until someone comes to get her.</li><li>despite this hatred of all things to do with being on her tummy, that is now the way she sleeps. since about 3 weeks ago, as soon as you put her in her crib, she grabs her nuk and rolls to her tummy. go figure. hence the new breathable bumpers that adorn her crib.</li><li>we had to make the switch to a "big girl" carseat. our lovely (and expensive) britax boulevard has made its appearance. in her infant seat, she would always try to sit upright. one time i went to get her out and found her with her head stuck between the head support and the window. enter new carseat. she is quite pleased with her new arrangements. though she will still thrash when you try to contain her with those darn straps sometimes.</li><li>it continues that as long as someone is looking at her, she is fine. she'll do her own thing, as long as she can see someone. dare to walk out of the room? you'll pay.</li><li>she will watch riley for hours on end. she thinks he is hilarious.</li><li>stranger danger has started to creep in. she'll still go to others, but she has to make sure she can see me.</li><li>still in size 2 diapers (and some cloth. with more on the way. yay!)</li><li>some clothes are still 3-6. mostly 6-12 because of the length. </li><li>hand to mouth coordination is excellent. she holds her bottle when she feels like it.</li><li>feet remain the greatest thing EVER.</li><li>she loves walks in her stroller. as long as she can sit up. duh.</li><li>a few times she has stood on the chair, holding on to the armrest. </li><li>solids are going much better. squash, sweet potatoes and carrots are her favorites. peas are also a go-to. i gave up on apples after a few tries. i'll have to revisit them. she does like bananas. i finally reintroduced rice cereal yesterday with some pears. that actually went fine. there must have been something about the texture that she had to get used to. i've been making all of her food.</li><li>apparently she is taking too many bottles. she was going 5-6 ounces every 3-4 hours. i guess she's only supposed to have 20-24 ounces per day. oops. we were also instructed to try to up her solids intake to twice a day instead of once, now that she's more receptive (and less repulsed). </li><li>macie is still getting some pumped breast milk from my 'stash'</li><li>we gave her a cup with water yesterday for the first time. surprisingly no choking. </li><li>she loves her baths, diaper changes, watching everyone, reading books</li><li>she hates getting dressed, being alone</li><li>at the doctor she was 16lbs 3 ounces (between 50th and 75th %) and 26 1/2 inches long (between 75th and 90th %). no problems growing here. </li><li>still no teeth, but i think they're coming. the gnawing is getting fierce.</li><li>she takes usually 3 naps per day. she finally is able to put herself to sleep (after much eye gauging on my part, and many looonnnggg weeks). she goes to bed about 7 pm. we usually wake her up at 10 or 11 and feed her one more time. then she'll sleep til about 7 or 730. praise the lord. </li></ul><div><br /><br /><br /><br /></div><p></p></div></div></div>erinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10204137969548359860noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8434099076567184500.post-42419255753310525082010-04-28T09:47:00.003-05:002010-06-08T22:15:52.219-05:00coffeeeeelot's o' coffee for the mama today.<br />because my kid woke me up last night.<br />because he had a nightmare about 'rolly pollies'. "ones that bite. nasty ones. that bite all the way".<br />so i woke up to screams of "help me! hellllppp me!"<br />which is what every parent wants to be jolted out of sleep to.<br />so i dash upstairs. sure to find riley a bloody mess because he fell out of bed.<br />or maybe trapped between the bed and the wall.<br />thankfully, such was not the case.<br />twas a nightmare about rolly pollies. whatever the f those are.<br />i assured him that he was safe from the rolly pollies (hopefully, since i'm not quite sure what they are. or how to stop their biting)<br />regardless, he requested my presence at the top of the stairs until he fell back asleep.<br />i proceeded to descend the stairs after a few minutes (mostly because i'm an awesome mom. partly because i loveeee sleep) only to step on a damn creaky step. foiled!<br />so that was my night.<br /><br />and now i need coffee.<br />and lots of it.<br />me thinks jesus invented coffee to ward off the devil (aka early morning)erinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10204137969548359860noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8434099076567184500.post-65478503994822737322010-04-27T20:55:00.003-05:002010-06-08T22:16:30.020-05:00the weight loss sagaas i already mentioned (er..um..yelled) in a previous post..i fit in my pre-pregnancy jeans!<br />to me that is just awesome. beyond awesome.<br />but still...it sucks.<br />because i continue to glare at my disgusting gut. it is getting smaller. but, friends we are not.<br />don't get me wrong. i'm totally proud of what my body did.<br />but i'm too young to wear moo moos.<br />and it's almost summer.<br />i'm down 8 lbs from 4 weeks ago. yay!<br />so i had to apologize to jillian michaels.<br />and onward we go.<br />(success is motivating, though).<br />as is still being able to pass for being pregnant if i don't suck it in...<br /><br />p.s. macie is going to be 6 months old on friday and it makes me soooo sad. and in riley news, he has taken to sleeping with this christmas book that plays silent night. i know when he falls asleep because he stops pressing the button. i dread the day that that thing breaks.erinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10204137969548359860noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8434099076567184500.post-20825691014060395912010-04-22T12:12:00.002-05:002010-06-08T22:17:41.538-05:00whooooooOMG!<br />i can button my pre-pregnancy jeans!<br />woot woot!erinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10204137969548359860noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8434099076567184500.post-36561693824338221222010-04-22T10:56:00.004-05:002010-04-22T12:15:20.010-05:00thankful on thursday<a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_6oNRSPj7Gik/S9Bz_7t4iqI/AAAAAAAAAG8/wTA5v7_0gl8/s1600/P1050983.JPG"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 320px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 240px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5462993890199505570" border="0" alt="" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_6oNRSPj7Gik/S9Bz_7t4iqI/AAAAAAAAAG8/wTA5v7_0gl8/s320/P1050983.JPG" /></a><br /><div><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_6oNRSPj7Gik/S9Bz_gQSXuI/AAAAAAAAAG0/Lx7gameZzBo/s1600/P1060051.JPG"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 320px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 240px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5462993882827611874" border="0" alt="" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_6oNRSPj7Gik/S9Bz_gQSXuI/AAAAAAAAAG0/Lx7gameZzBo/s320/P1060051.JPG" /></a><br /><br /><div><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_6oNRSPj7Gik/S9Bz-0zcnOI/AAAAAAAAAGs/SKUbwPCY8WM/s1600/P1060040.JPG"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 320px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 240px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5462993871163923682" border="0" alt="" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_6oNRSPj7Gik/S9Bz-0zcnOI/AAAAAAAAAGs/SKUbwPCY8WM/s320/P1060040.JPG" /></a>a few of the blogs i follow do this on a regular basis.<br /><div>with everything that i have going on, i thought it might be helpful to look at what i have.</div><div>so, what am i thankful for on this gorgeous thursday in april?</div><br /><div>*the beautiful spring weather. the sun surely helps to put a smile on everyone's face (even mine!)</div><div>*my wonderful kids and the opportunity to stay home with them. how else would i get to spend my morning making a "question box" to fill with riley's frequent and complex questions?</div><div>*being finished with my bachelors (yay me!), even if i will be going right back in the fall.</div><div>*an understanding husband who hasn't run screaming from my craziness.</div><div>*lexapro (haha!) and people who can relate</div><br /><div>as hard as some days are to get through lately (post to follow on that), i do have so much to be thankful for!</div></div></div>erinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10204137969548359860noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8434099076567184500.post-10816874995086647232010-04-22T10:44:00.001-05:002010-06-08T22:19:19.050-05:00i have a tripod-eryou know. that awkward thing that babies do..in between being a lump and sitting?<br /><br />no?<br /><br />well i guess i'll have to show you.<br /><br /><br /><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_6oNRSPj7Gik/S9BuIDmUBkI/AAAAAAAAAGk/rd7ce1_X6XQ/s1600/P1060068.JPG"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 320px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 240px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5462987432684422722" border="0" alt="" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_6oNRSPj7Gik/S9BuIDmUBkI/AAAAAAAAAGk/rd7ce1_X6XQ/s320/P1060068.JPG" /></a><br /><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_6oNRSPj7Gik/S9BuH5FcWuI/AAAAAAAAAGc/lG0-qoamQT0/s1600/P1060066.JPG"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 320px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 240px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5462987429862202082" border="0" alt="" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_6oNRSPj7Gik/S9BuH5FcWuI/AAAAAAAAAGc/lG0-qoamQT0/s320/P1060066.JPG" /></a><br /><div>she's been doing it for about a week and a half now.</div><br /><div>pretty cute, huh?</div>erinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10204137969548359860noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8434099076567184500.post-90964632230406060522010-04-21T20:11:00.003-05:002010-06-08T22:24:13.842-05:00judgementever notice that no matter what you do, someone always has something to say?<br />take breastfeeding for example. when i put a bottle in macie's mouth, people look at me like i'm giving her poison. really? i tried my hardest to breastfeed. i gave it more than a good shot. and most days i still feel terrible about it. guilty. like i'm not doing my best for her. so i don't need it coming from somewhere else. "oh..you're not nursing?" no. no i'm not. i apparently don't love my kid enough. do me a favor and call child protective services? thanks, you're a dear.<br />did ysee me crying for weeks everytime i nursed? everytime macie was sprayed in her face with milk? choked the whole feeding because of my massive over-supply? attempt to comfort her as she screamed (and i mean screamed) for every.single.minute that she wasn't sleeping?<br />doubtful.<br />so don't even go there.<br />let me just say that i am not one to keep my mouth shut. sometimes i just glare. sometimes it takes everything in me to not say something immature like "oh...you're not capable of shutting your fat face?"<br />if i am doing something terrible, call me out on it. next time you see me driving with a carseat on top of my car, tell me that you don't really think that's a great idea.<br />yet, i have to admit that i am also a culprit. i am not innocent of all judgement. i roll my eyes at the woman swearing at her kids for saying piss. really? maybe if every other word out of your mouth wasn't piss, they wouldn't say it? i scoff at the dad letting his infant suck on a bottle filled with juice. tooth decay much? but i don't know them.<br />i guess what i'm trying to say is that we don't know anyone else's story. if someone is harming their children, step in. but you don't know why i don't breastfeed. and i don't know why you feed your baby juice. maybe you have your reasons? i know i do.<br />we need to support each other. there are moms we will never see eye to eye with. everyone has their own parenting style. everyone is entitled to make their own choices. but it would be so much easier if we had people to turn to. maybe those moms that we're judging can relate to us. maybe they feed they baby poison too?erinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10204137969548359860noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8434099076567184500.post-41513028487101047512010-04-19T20:48:00.004-05:002010-06-08T22:20:02.321-05:00will i ever be on time again?i think not.<br />and it irks matt to no end.<br />while he sits in the car, cursing my sheer existence, i'm sure.<br />i do try my hardest, really.<br />but no matter how much time i leave myself, whether i pack the diaper bag the night before or not...i am always late.<br />i think it's inevitable. i might as well just give in.<br />because without a doubt, just as we're about to walk out the door, someone has to go potty, or someone projectile vomits over themself and everyone/thing within a 10 foot radius, or someone takes their shoes off (?), or someone needs to eat, or the keys are missing.<br />one time, i got out of the house on time. then i realized i forgot the kids. so i had to go back anway. and i was late. joking!<br />for realz tho, i would love to be able to amble my way to my destination.<br />instead you find me shaking my fist and swearing under my breath at that driver who DARED change lanes. or *gasp* slow down too much for the yellow light because damnit i could have driven a semi through there before the light turned red and now i'm stuck here behind your slow ass.<br />i'm really pretty high strung (to put it nicely) anyway, so constantly being late adds a whole new level to my insanity.<br />oh well. such is life, no?erinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10204137969548359860noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8434099076567184500.post-67700925367558222662010-04-06T11:57:00.002-05:002010-04-06T12:00:11.871-05:00dear targetplease stop making ridiculously cute clothes that i cannot fit into.<br />it's not just the pants. although, there is some improvement needed in that area.<br />it is also the adorable dresses. that my gigantic boobs make look ridiculous. like my boobs pull the front of the dress halfway up my stomach. i don't like to cry in your store.<br />so either accomodate or cease production.<br />thank you.<br />love,<br />erinerinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10204137969548359860noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8434099076567184500.post-23048773585225364822010-04-05T19:50:00.004-05:002010-06-08T22:20:51.553-05:00easter (a little late...)we had a gorgeous, relaxing easter. perfect for macie's first.<br /><br />we dyed eggs the day before (i know. we're soooo on top of things). first with riley's (and our)friends across the street. then at home. riley asked matt to call the easter bunny and have him hide eggs out in our backyard.<br /><br />so riley woke up ready to hunt! he found his basket and some eggs in the house. then we went outside. he apparently likes things to be hiden in obvious places. not patient enough for a challenge. i try not to do too much candy. riley got a science kit in his basket (i'm THAT mom). and the candy i do buy is partially for matt as well. lol.<br /><br />we got all fancied up and went to church. spent a few hours with my dad's side of the family. it was also a birthday celebration for two of my younger cousins. you know, one of those resurrection of jesus/birthday celebrations.<br /><br />then we came home and relaxed, while riley came down from his sugar high. we refused to do 3 easter celebrations (my parents are divorced=2, plus matt's parents). hell to pay (more on that later) but it's our family and that's how we want to do it. it's what works for us.<br /><br />riley has been a pill to put to bed lately (water, potty, water, potty, too warm, potty, missing stuffed animal, potty). but this night was exceptional. he was wayyy overtired. we went through the usual asking and refusing. me clawing at my eyes. the child is as stubborn as i am. now i see how annoying i am. payback? karma? but i digress. so he wanted candy. you know, because he hadn't slipped far enough into the candy-induced coma. the kid could hardly keep his eyes open. but refused to go to bed.<br /><br />"i want candy"<br /><br />"no"<br /><br />"i want candy"<br /><br />"no"<br /><br />"i.want.candyyyyyy"<br /><br />"noooo"<br /><br />it went on for hours. i think. with neither of us backing down. i was in the office across the hall. so he couldn't see me altering between snickering and bashing my head into the desk. i'm pretty sure it ended when he passed out mid-sentence. he didn't even want candy!erinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10204137969548359860noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8434099076567184500.post-90519698962315739522010-04-05T19:47:00.004-05:002010-06-08T22:22:29.593-05:00i lovegorgeous sunny days<br /><br /><br /><br />the chance to feel awesome again<br /><br /><br /><br />rocking macie while she rubs my face and pinches my arm and lets go (over and over) until she falls asleep<br /><br /><br /><br />the way riley will abruptly stop playing, walk over to me, give me a hug and tell me "mommy. i love you."<br /><br /><br /><br />how riley hugs macie. with just his hands touching her head.<br /><br /><br />conversations with riley:<br />"riley what if you were a crab?"<br />"but i'm not. i'm a human"<br />"but what if you HAD to be a crab?"<br />"well i guess i'd deal with it..."<br /><br />cozy nights on the couch with the hubby, wine and 'criminal minds'erinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10204137969548359860noreply@blogger.com0